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  • Writer's pictureLeah Jones

Again with the Bridesmaid dresses, take them away from my closet.

Maybe you all didn’t get a good feel for how great these dresses are, let me tell you a little more about each one.

The Maroon One.

I was Ish’s maid of honor the summer after graduation and shortly before I moved to Colorado. We were a small bridal party, two and two. The Best Man was married, but the other groomsman–watch out. We flirted dangerously during the rehearsal and afterwards at the rehearsal dinner and at the post-rehearsal dinner party, just the six of us.

The day of the wedding, a few bad things happend. First of all, the day of a wedding is never the time to experiment with Hair Product and I did. I used, for the first time, some stuff that made your hair into some sort of sculpture. My hair became an immobile force–after combining the sculpting product with the heat of a hair dryer. The Bride nearly passed out from fright between the photographs and the beginning of the ceremony and the Other Groomsmen Ex-Girlfriend showed up to the reception. All of our carefree flirting dissolved much quicker than the product in my hair did.

However, over the course of the day downstate, I looked fantastic in a deep maroon bridesmaid dress. It was made by a tailor to my exact measurements. It was even lined. It wants to dance again or be tailored into something more up-to-date.

The Green One.

This was for Sara and Emry’s Christmas Eve Eve wedding. We shocked and horrified the woman at JC Penney when I ordered the dress and didn’t tell her what dye lot the dress should come from. But what if they don’t match PERFECTLY?!?!?! Um, the bride doesn’t care, so why should you?

The night before the wedding, the bridal party stood in a room in our empire waisted dresses looking in the mirror and saying, “Does this make me look pregnant?” Yes, yes, and yes–but we are all in this together and there is no time to make us look less pregnant.

The dress had a great time during the wedding, at the reception, and squeezed into a booth at Olde Tymers with the rest of the green wedding party. It would love to be altered into perhaps a knee length or tea length dress for you’re next semi-formal. Or, keep it long and add a stole for a winter formal. The velvet is perfect for a winter formal or office christmas party. Think ahead ladies.

The Purple One.

The Purple One danced the night away at my sister’s wedding in 2001. As her maid of honor and entire bridal party, I got to choose a dress on my own and unsupervised. HOORAY! There was just one request she made. “Don’t look like a slut.” You see, she’d spent a weekend at David’s Bridal and saw how slutty the prom dress look these days and was worried I might gravitate to the prom dresses. I made a side trip to the David’s Bridal in Denver to pick this two piece bad baby out. Granted, I had to do slim fast to get into it in time for the wedding, it was a great option.

The halter style of the top showed off my tatoo on my upper back nicely, without looking trashy. The voluminous skirt was so fun to twirl in. As I policed her reception, telling friends to smoke in the reception room and get their booties on the dance floor, I was a purple delight.

So you see, you must take one, two, or three of these bridesmaid’s dresses. I just got everything dry cleaned, all are 22/24 ish. At this point, I’d be happy to get back the cost of dry-cleaning ($11 each) and maybe another dollar or two for the storytelling.

What do you think?

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