Forcing a trade.
My friend Bill, from improv class, is full of stories and strange analogies. The stories and analogies are actually good bits of advice on the love front. Here are the three things he told me.
1. Never force a trade. When trading stocks, you set parameters. If the trade doesn’t fit the parameters, sometimes a trader will try and squeeze it into the parameters. The trader wants so badly to make a successfull trade, he’ll trade anything and call it good. Eventually you study and realize that it is never a good idea to force a trade. Just leave it alone and move on to the next one. (Basically a financial analogy that is the same thing as the entire book “He’s just not that into you.”)
2. Tell your crush you like him. Based on an important experience in eighth grade, it is how he snagged his wife. Very simple. Very frightening.
3. Just have some disastrous relationships before you get married. To which I replied–what do you think I’ve been trying to do? I’ve been courting disasters for 10 years and STILL can’t get past a first date. And not because I’m waiting for perfect, but most of them haven’t had enough chemistry for a disaster drill relationship.
Three is funny, because my good friend Fadi gave me the same advice when I was twenty. His was a little more harsh. “Get your heart broken. Then you’ll find out who you are.”
So I will quit forcing trades, call my 8th grade crush and tell him I like him, and jump into a Titanic relationship and hope to hit an iceberg sometime around the 4th of July.