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  • Writer's pictureLeah Jones

When Im in my head, Im not on paper.

I haven’t been writing a lot lately on here. My apologies. Excuses include working a lot, listening to too many Christmas Carols at work and not having brain space left for non carol thoughts, a very sick Grandma, a perfect moment with a 1980’s soundtrack, and a sink full of dishes I can’t bring myself to wash.

Yesterday or the day before, my grandma had all of her living children in one room (except for Uncle Bob in Arizona) as well as many of her neices. I have always considered mom’s side of the family to be matriarchal, with Grandma and Sister at the helm. Smoking cigarettes, drinking coffee, coughing, talking, and cooking. Now Grandma is the last one of her brothers and sisters. She has a crowd of people on the other side, including a daughter and two grandchildren, who are waiting for her. But she also has a crowd of people on this side who aren’t quite ready to say goodbye. Five children, grandchildren, great-grandchildren, and not quite here Henry.

Earlier in the week, I had the most perfect moment I’ve had in years and years and years. It blew me away, so I’ve just been sitting on it. Not talking about it much, not writing about it. It was better than a John Hughes 80’s movie, but the soundtrack was the same. I hope something comes of it, but in case it was a fluke, I’m trying to check myself, before I wreck myself.

Otherwise, it’s been as normal a week as it can be.

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